Thursday, July 24, 2003


[Comfort food at it's finest.]

1/2 an onion
A couple chopped cloves of garlic
Some butter
12 oz. can chunk light tuna, drained
Can of Cream of Asparagus (or celery, or mushroom) soup
Cream or Milk
1/2 a small bag of frozen peas
Bag of wide egg noodles
A small can of those French's Fried Onions
4 oz. sour cream (1/2 of a small container)

Saute chopped onion and garlic in butter until soft.
Cook and drain noodles.
Warm peas in the microwave for a couple minutes (they don't have to be fully cooked).
Mix everything into a large casserole except 1/2 the can of French's Fried Onions.
Add milk or cream as needed (it gets much thicker as it bakes) and loads of salt and pepper.
Bake covered for 30 minutes at 350°.
Sprinkle the remaining half a can of fried onions and cook uncovered another 5-8 minutes.

If you don't like those fried onions, you can use crumbled potato chips.

11:51 PM 0 comments
Sunday, July 20, 2003

Pizza Doubleheader from Anya

Pizza Florentine

Pizza crust or thin focaccia bread
1 jar alfredo sauce
1 chicken breast
1 package frozen chopped spinach
2+ cups. fontina, smoked mozzarella, or whatever good melting cheese you prefer
1.5 T. olive oil
2-3 cloves garlic
Cajun seasoning (not mandatory)
Cayenne pepper (optional)


Unwrap crust and brush on olive oil. Using a garlic press, crush garlic onto crust and spread around on crust evenly. Bake at 350 degrees just until crust starts to change color (you don’t want to cook the crust anymore or else it will burn later). Next heat up an iron skillet, or other pan if you don’t have a skillet. I like to season my chicken with my Dad’s Cajun seasoning, which basically is just an all purpose meat seasoning. Emeril’s will do or just some S & P if you don’t have any of those. While you are doing this defrost the spinach in the microwave per the directions. Next grill the chicken in the pan until cooked. Remove and “pull” the chicken which just means shred it with two forks. Take out the spinach and drain with your hands. Grate your cheese, depending on how much you prefer. Spread the alfredo sauce on the crust just enough so you can’t see the crust. I like a light sprinkling of cayenne pepper so I put it on now so that it doesn’t all stick to my lips and burn the fire out of me; if you don’t like spicy foods, leave it off. Next sprinkle the cheese on, a rule of thumb for pizza cheese is no sauce showing through, but I like extra cheese so I add more. (Save some cheese for the end though.) Then add the drained spinach, you won’t need it all, probably only about ¾ of the package. Next add the chicken. Last, sprinkle the rest of the cheese on; this will keep the chicken from falling off when you cut and pick up the pizza slice. Bake at 400 degrees until the pizza is golden brown and the middle of the pizza is bubbly.

You can add or change this pizza to your liking. I often add black olives, pepperoni, feta cheese or blue cheese.


Pizza a la ex-boyfriend

This was my ex’s favorite recipe.

First you must get high and eat all of my granola bars as an hors devours, in one sitting. Be sure to leave a granola trail around the house especially in the bathroom near the toilet. (EW!)

You’ll need one Totino’s frozen combo pizza
Crush up half a bag of my favorite croutons, please leave the bag open so they are stale for me later
Rip up some of that nasty processed orange crap you call cheese, maybe 2 or 3
Strategically throw it all on top of your combo pizza
Don’t forget the layer of black pepper and salt
Bake at anywhere from 250-525,
(depending on how high you are or if you have been hanging out with Jack this evening)
Swear when the over starts smoking from the orange plastic dripping off the pizza onto the burners.
Eat your culinary masterpiece at warp speed being sure to burn your tongue and lips.
Wash down with a Heineken, or 7.

As for dessert, empty a bag of Swanson chicken nuggets onto the cookie sheet, cook and eat.

Don’t forget the lake of Ranch dressing you simply must have to accompany your dish.

Trust me, this will be a hit with all the family.

3:52 PM 0 comments
Wednesday, July 16, 2003

Pesto Linguine, Balsamic Grilled Chicken, Garlicky Green Beans

Put the coals on the grill and get the grilll good and hot. (All the coals should be covered in ash and red on the inside, but not flaming any longer.) Marinate boneless chicken breasts in a gallon-size Ziplock with 1/3 cup balsamic vinegar, 1/3 cup olive oil, juice of one lemon, a tablespoon of rock salt and some freshly ground pepper.

While chicken is marinating, make the pesto.
Boil whole wheat pasta according to package directions. Drain and stir in a little olive oil to keep the noodles from sticking.

Puree together about 1 cup fresh basil, 3-4 cloves (NOT bulbs, genius) garlic, 1/4 cup pine nuts, 1/4-1/2 cup olive oil and a handful of freshly grated parmesan cheese. Put some salt and pepper in there to taste.

Stir pesto into pasta. Leave out on counter to become room-temp.

Take an old rag, soak it in vegetable oil (any kind will do) and grease down the grill before you put it over the hot coals. (This is so the chicken doesn't stick.) Cook the chicken breasts about 4-5 minutes on each side, or until they are cooked through. (Test them by cutting one of the thickest parts with a knife.) Flip only once, and cook covered.

While chicken is cooking, get a frying pan somewhat hot on the stove. Crush two cloves of garlic with the flat side of a knife, and throw them in the hot pan with 2 tablespoons olive oil and a tablespoon of butter. When the butter is melted, throw in about a half pound of green beans. Stir them around a little to get them good and oily, and throw in a handful of pine nuts if you like. This is where I also put some rock salt into the pan, but you can use regular salt if you're a total loser. Let them cook about 5 minutes, stirring a couple of times so they don't burn. The pan will probably smoke a little, so unplug the battery in your fire alarm. When the beans are done (taste testing them is the only way to test for firmness), put them in a bowl, squeeze a little fresh lemon juice on top.

I also made garlic bread: Smash 2 cloves of garlic and melt them in 2 tablespoons of butter and a little salt. Cut a loaf of crusty bread on the diagonal and put it on a piece of tin foil. Drizzle the butter over the cuts in the bread. Bake in the oven at 350 while you make the beans.

Voila. You are a goddamn genius. Just like me.

12:55 PM 0 comments
Saturday, July 12, 2003

from Catherine, at

Kiss the Cook

Yesterday, my husband instant messaged me with this: "The basic underpinnings of a gas grill are really quite simple: First come burners to create heat. Above them you'll find some type of system to disperse the heat from the burners. Above those lie the cooking grates. Let's look under the hood to get a better sense of what you should be looking for." What hood?

"Do you want gas or charcoal," he continued, using the psychology of a parent who avoids a "no" by not allowing "no" to be a choice.

"Charcoal," I thought. I could see bricks glowing half white. Matches and lighter fluid. Sooty hands. No scary gas grills with propane tanks that explode and result in warehouse fires. No dials that go "click . . . click . . . click" like a bomb. Why do we even have to get a grill? Can't we do take out all summer? Work hard and come home to someone else's home cooking. Sounds like summer to me. Or how about a blender? We could get a blender instead.

But what I said was, "Well, I prefer charcoal, but if we get gas, we can use it all year round, even when it snows."

This grill attraction is such a guy thing. Why not get as excited over the prospect of making long-cooked oatmeal at the kitchen stove? Heat, food, utensils. It's all the same, and safer and no flies or mosquitoes. So I raised the subject in the office. "Hey guys, what do you think about cooking outside?" Bill said all in one breath and without a pause: "You know what kind you want get a big one but don't fall for the external burner and don't go nuts with accessories I bought the cast iron box for wood chips but chips wrapped in aluminum foil packages work better you want a brush with a long handle but those forks and spatulas are pointless."


Other responses:

"Don't ask me. I don't grill. I burned pasta on the stove once. I dropped one pre-cooked piece of spaghetti into the burner, and the flame travelled up the length of the piece and caught the rest of the pasta sticking out of the too-small pan. The sink was full of dishes. I had to put it out in the bathtub. "

"I had a hamburger catch fire in a toaster oven once."

"When i was about five, we had a beer keg that my stepfather rigged up and we used as a grill. After grilling for dinner, we played dodge ball. Running from the ball, I tried to hide behind the beer keg-grill, and put both palms on it to duck. I spent the next 4 hours in the emergency room with second degree burns on my palms."

"We never grilled. My dad drank instead. If he ever got close to a grill, I think he would have caught on fire."

It sounded like the set of News Radio.

11:55 AM 0 comments
Tuesday, July 08, 2003

Chips, Crisps or whatever they are called where you're from:

from Becca

Home-made healthy potato chips!

1 large potato
1/2 tsp. olive oil

1. Cut the potato into very thin slices
2. Combine olive oil and some salt (or other spices,
depending on what you like. You could also add
vinegar) in a plastic bag.
3. Add the potato slices to the bag, blow it up, seal,
and shake shake shake your booty.
4. Remove potato slices from bag and arrange on plate.
Place in microwave (on high) for about 2 minutes
5. Turn slices over, put them back in the microwave
for another 2 minutes

Keep doing this until the slices look slightly brown.
Then remove the plate from the microwave and let
everything cool - the chips will get crispy as they
cool off. Enjoy!

7:04 AM 0 comments